Threads of Fate
by Anneka Neko
Summary: DISCONTINUED. Kazuki likes coffee, now that he's tried it. Now he's hyper and bored. So he calls on Emishi to help him out in an attempt to matchmake Akabane and Ginji. A simple plan, really...AkabanexGinji Rated T for violence once Akabane gets mad.
1. Matchmakers?

Authoress' Notes:

Well, this is kind of rare. I actually have the entire plot pretty much planned out already! So hopefully I can actually finish this one in a reasonable amount of time.

Now, I know people will tell me that Kazuki is way OOC here. Well, maybe he would be- but have you ever seen him on coffee? No. So he's still good ole in-character Kazuki… just on coffee.

Anyways, the next chapter is on the way, but this is exam week. So I should post within a week or so, but hopefully much sooner.

DISCLAIMER- I DUN OWN ANYTHING!

**nyanyanyanya**

**Chapter One**

**Matchmakers?**

Kazuki had officially decided something: he _liked_ coffee. He was surprised at this revelation. He'd been suitably skeptical an hour before, when Ban first suggested he try it. _After all_, he'd thought, _anything Snake Boy likes…_

But he had been surprised when he'd tried it and… he actually _liked_ it.

Now Kazuki sat, still drinking coffee, beginning to feel caffeine coursing through his veins. He was bored. So, he began looking around for a way to utilize this newfound energy.

The Threadmaster's eyes settled upon Akabane Kurodou. The transporter stood leaning against the wall, unmoving and silent.

Having selected his victim, Kazuki had just started wondering how to torment the Doctor with his life intact, when the door opened and in walked Ginji and Emishi.

The Fresh Blood Joker was busy berating Ginji, who looked somewhat ashamed. "I'm tellin' ya Ginji. I know it's fun. I know you get excited. I _know_ you have trouble controlling it when you're excited. But you CANNOT keep getting so excited that you short out the DDR machine every time!"

"Sorry!" Ginji whined. He sat down next to Ban, sulking.

Kazuki smiled, gesturing Emishi over to him.

"Yo! Threadhead! 'sup?" Emishi greeted him cheerfully, sitting down across the table from Kazuki.

Kazuki, for his part, grinned, whispering conspiratorially, "I have an idea that could prove rather entertaining."

Emishi, who had already noted the mostly empty coffee mug, was intrigued. Who knew what sort of fun evilness a hyper Kazuki could dream up? Interested, he leaned forward and said, "Tell me more."

Kazuki's response was simply a nod in Akabane's direction, a nod in Ginji's and then a raising of one eyebrow.

Emishi sat there, puzzled. _Huh?_ he thought.

Kazuki mouthed a single word.

"Matchmakers?"

Emishi almost cracked up, but luckily held it in- he didn't want to annoy the Jackal.

"You serious?" he muttered.

"Yep." Kazuki had a determined glint in his eyes.

Emishi sat there, thinking about it. Finally, he shrugged. "What the hell? Should be fun. Let's do it!"

"…how though?" Kazuki mused after a moment.

They sat there a while, deep in thought. Suddenly, Emishi grinned.

"I've got an idea…"

**nyanyanyanya**

I'm so horrible, leaving you on a mini-cliffhanger.

Oh, just in case someone isn't totally familiar with these characters- Kurodou Akabane and Doctor Jackal are the same person. Haruki Emishi and the Fresh Blood Joker are the same person. And Kazuki is actually Threadmaster Kazuki. So that's why I sometimes switched it around there.

Anyways, please review and tell me what you think! Actual input is always welcome- flames are not. Flamers will be severely… fussed at.


	2. Subtlety is Overrated

Authoress' Notes:

Well, here's the second chapter! Special thanks to Kavya-san for helping me decide that Emishi would say "AAAAAACK!" (as opposed to "EEEK!", "YIKES!" or any of the other possibilities.)

Oh, and Akabane-sama's scalpels are the glowing anime kind, mmk? If that offends you, then just pretend the word "glowing" isn't in there.

DISCLAIMER: I DUN OWN ANYTHING!

-

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**- **

**Chapter Two**

**Subtlety is Overrated**

**- **

Emishi leaned closer, whispering to the Threadmaster, "Let's start by asking. If we catch them off guard, maybe we can startle them into a confession!"

"Good plan!" Kazu enthused. "I'll ask Ginji!"

Emishi looked slightly less thrilled. "Aw, I wanted to ask Ginji!"

The normally dignified and composed Threadmaster stuck his tongue out at the other man. "Too bad. I called it." And with that, he got up and walked over towards Ginji.

Emishi groaned, but walked over to Akabane.

"N-ne, Akabane-sama?"

The hat moved up slightly, revealing the violet death glare beneath. "Yes, Emishi-san?" the Doctor asked in a sweet voice.

"Um… well…"

Akabane merely blinked, waiting.

"W-we were wondering…" He felt sweat pouring down him, caught as he was in that Gaze of Death.

Emishi took a deep breath and asked in a rush, "DoyoulikeGinji?"

The voice grew even sweeter. "I beg your pardon?"

"Do you… ya know… like… _like_ like Ginji?"

Emishi whimpered as the death gaze bored through him…

-----

Kazuki had a much easier time. It was also much more fun.

"Ne, Ginji-kun?"

"Hm? Whzit, K'zu?" Ginji mumbled, mouth full of pizza.

"Do you have a crush on Akabane-sama?"

Ginji paused in wolfing down his food, choking. Kazuki helpfully pounded the boy's back, dislodging the offending pizza.

"W-WHAT?" Ban was startled, to say the least.

Ginji had by now flushed to a rather interesting shade of raspberry.

"W-w-what do y-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!"

Everyone's heads whipped around towards the source of the commotion.

Emishi stood pressed against the wall. Around him, 108 glowing scalpels formed a perfect outline. As the group stared, Emishi slowly stepped away, put some distance between himself and Akabane and then took off sprinting for the back room. He _said_, in passing, that he was just going to see if Paul had a band-aid. (One scalpel had gone slightly too close, grazing the Joker's cheek.)

Dead silence filled the small store. Jackal slowly walked towards the back. As he walked, 108 scalpels flew through the air and buried themselves in the Jackal's flesh, fading from sight.

As Akabane advanced towards the back room, Shido, who had missed the cause for the commotion but could sense the imminent termination of his friend's life, stepped into the Doctor's path.

Akabane had never looked so dangerous. His expression was a study in absolute control, but his eyes blazed with violet fire, and the blades rippled slightly beneath his skin.

Shido stood firm. "Come on, Akabane-san. What could Emishi have done that was so bad?"

"Beastmaster," a calm, dangerous voice hissed from under the hat, "I have no wish to harm you. However, if you do not step aside and let me at that fool who dares try to matchmake me, I will be forced to cause you rather grievous bodily damage."

Shido was trying desperately to choke back his laughter as he stepped aside.

Akabane knew he was grossly overreacting, but he couldn't help it. He didn't know why, but the Joker's question had touched a hidden nerve.

Suddenly, Ginji stepped into his path. Energy crackled at his fingertips, and he said, "Back down, Akabane-san."

Akabane paused, startled. "What do you think you're doing, Ginji-kun?" he asked in that dangerously sweet voice.

Ginji looked a little frightened, but he also looked determined. "I'm stopping you. Leave Emishi alone."

Akabane and Ginji simply stood, staring at each other. Neither made a move, though Akabane's hands were poised to pull out the scalpels and attack, and the lightning blazed in Ginji's hands.

Suddenly, Kazuki jumped, chibified, between them. "I KNEW IT!"

Everyone, Akabane and Ginji included, stared now at Kazuki.

"OH MY GEESE! YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER!"

While the spectators continued to stare, Akabane slowly backed away. "_What?_" he asked.

"You'd've already killed each other, but you can't bear to, 'cuz you're in LOVE!"

Emishi popped out of the back room, grabbed Kazuki's hair and yanked the Threadmaster into the back with him. The door slammed an instant before ten scalpels buried themselves in the door. The scalpels were followed closely by a bolt of lightning.

-

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**- **

Ok, well that concludes the second chapter! By the way, credit for the "OH MY GEESE!" line goes to Sumi-onee-sama. That's gotta be the best translation of "omg" I've ever seen.

I'm currently lookin' at maybe seven chapters, but that may end up changing. Please review!


	3. May I Have This Dance?

Authoress' Notes:

Well, I knew exactly where I wanted this chapter to go. I knew what should happen here. I'd even picked out the last two lines! But I couldn't figure out for the longest time _how_ to get it to where I wanted. Then I decided that, since tomorrow is my birthday (SIXTEEN! –heart- -heart-), I'd just finish it as best I could as my present to y'all for my birthday. ('Cause I make sense like that.) So anyways, yeah, that's why it took longer than I'd expected. Sorry for the delay! (and for the fact that it's short x.x;)

DISCLAIMER: I DUN OWN ANYTHING!

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**Chapter Three**

It had been a couple of weeks since the first matchmaking fiasco, and it looked as if things might have settled back down again. Kazuki had gotten addicted to coffee, but there was only that one incident after the matchmaking, and honestly, how was he to have known that that delivery guy wasn't an enemy in disguise? Good thing the poor guy'd already gotten insurance.

So… story's over, right? No more matchmaking?

That's what everyone thought. But Kazuki and Emishi were merely biding their time. The time, they knew, had come. Time to put their plot into motion…

-

**May I Have This Dance?**

-

"It's time," Kazuki whispered, in passing, to Emishi. "Tonight," he added.

The Joker merely nodded slightly. He knew what the Threadmaster meant.

And all was calm and serene in the Honky Tonk. The unsuspecting mortals inside went about their daily lives as usual, stealing pizzas, gulping down said pizzas, electrocuting each other… but soon, their lives would all be changed.

-----

That night, all was silent. No shadow moved, no sound was heard. The clouds drifted quietly over the full moon.

Suddenly, the door opened. Kazuki crept in, followed by Emishi, who was holding a key he'd stolen the day before while Paul was occupied in rescuing a pizza from Ban and Ginji.

The two men were swift and sure in their preparations. Doors were locked, shutters drawn, stereos prepared. Disco balls soon hung from the ceiling, along with cheesy shoujo roses. Cherry blossoms drifted to the floor, where an elaborate machine, kind of like those in those dinky little fountains people have in their offices, sucked them up to the ceiling to fall again.

Finally, they were ready. Kazuki straightened, pulling a book out of his pocket. He and Emishi sat together at a booth while they opened Love Spells for Dummies to page 234. They leaned together to read over their instructions one last time.

**Chapter Seventy-Two**

**How to Make Two Guys Fall in Love When One is a Former Gang Leader With a Dark and Mysterious Past and the Other is a Sadistic Transporter with a Dark and Mysterious Past and Both Want to, are Plotting to, Have Tried to and/or Have Succeeded in a Plot to Kill You and/or Your Associates**

They thoroughly read the chapter. Emishi tapped his finger next to the last paragraph:

**Remember! Before you begin the spell, make sure that everyone who participates chugs a glass of chocolate milk. Nesquik works best. Each glass should be exactly 7.32451 inches tall, 3.17528 inches in diameter, and be made of highest-quality clear glass, hand-blown at the little pizzeria across the street from your uncle Herman's house.**

"Right!" Kazuki said. "Let's go check the kitchen."

The two poked about the kitchen for a while. "Hey, here we go!" Emishi called out from the closet.

"Emishi, come out of the closet! I can't see what you're talking about!" Kazuki replied.

Emishi brought out a box, which the two set on the counter.

**GLASSY GLASSES! **the box proclaimed. **GENUINE HIGHEST-QUALITY HAND-BLOWN CLEAR GLASS! EACH GLASS 7.32451 INCHES TALL AND 3.17528 INCHES IN DIAMETER! HAND-BLOWN AT JOEY'S PIZZERIA!**

"Hey, Joey's! My uncle Herman lives across from there!" Emishi exclaimed. "Joey's wife makes a _mean_ pepperoni deep-dish!"

Kazuki grinned. "Good thing Ginji dropped his glass last week! Otherwise Paul never might have ordered these!"

He quickly went to the refrigerator and opened it. He poked his head inside. "Hey, where's the milk?"

Emishi shoved his head in under the Threadmaster's. "Right here, you idiot. In the Gatorade bottle."

Kazuki blushed, looking sheepish. "I knew that!" he said, taking the Gatorade bottle over to the counter. Emishi, meanwhile, rolled his eyes at the Threadmaster's stupidity, opened the box and pulled out two glasses. He then went to the cabinet.

"Umm, do we even _have_ any Nesquik?"

Now Kazuki was the one rolling his eyes. "Who's stupid now? It's right here in the prunes box, you idiot!"

Kazuki ducked as Emishi aimed a half-hearted swipe at him. "I totally knew that!" the Joker said loftily.

The two swiftly mixed the Nesquik and the milk in their glasses. Kazuki lifted his glass.

"A toast!"

Emishi, too, lifted his glass. "A toast! To matchmaking!"

"To matchmaking!" Kazuki agreed. The glasses clinked together, and the two chugged their chocolate milk.

Now they moved back to the main room. Looking over their preparations, they turned towards each other, sharing a secretive smile.

It was time…

It was time… to begin.

Kazuki moved towards the stereo, pressing a button. The "Cha Cha Slide" began blasting out from the speakers. Standing in the middle of the room, they began dancing- but not according to the steps called. Oh no! _This_ spell required that they go backwards. On "to the left" _they_ went to the _right_. On "take it back now, y'all!" _they_ took it _forwards_ now, y'all! They hopped _backwards_ instead of forwards.

Each time the order to "cha cha real smooth!" came on, Kazuki and Emishi instead did the Macarena. While Macarena-ing merrily along, they chanted, "Akabane! Akabane! Ginji! Ginji! Ginji! Ginji! Akabane! Akabane! LOVE! LOVE! LOVE!"

After they were done, the two cleaned up and headed back to their homes, tired but pleased with a job well done.

-----

The next morning, Paul found the **GLASSY GLASSES!** box out on the counter. He knew for a fact that he'd left nothing on the counter the night before. Wondering what had happened, he checked the security cameras.

…on second thought, maybe he didn't _want_ to know what had happened.

**nyanyanyanyanya**

If there actually _is_ a Love Spells for Dummies book out there, _do_ tell me, mmk? 'Cause that'll be really funny.

Oh, and in case people aren't seeing this… by shoujo roses I mean the kind that appear in series like "Mermaid Melody Pichi Pichi Pitch" or "Tokyo Mew Mew". You know when the girl's love interest shows and he's (or she's) got sparklies all over and either rainbowy bubbles or sparkly roses floatin' around? Yeah, that's what I was referring to. And on a similar theme, there's that whole stereotype of floating cherry blossoms appearing for a love scene that I was makin' fun of there.

Please review!


	4. Can You Feel the Love Tonight?

Authoress' Notes:

Ok, well, this isn't exactly a review _reply_, so it's allowed! I swear!

I just wanted to thank people like **LittleLinor**-san, **ideagala**-san, **Ice Dragon3**-san, Aoi-sama, Sumi-onee-sama, Terhi-san and anyone else I'm forgettin' (sorry if I forgot to list you!), who've been givin' me all those really nice reviews! It's just really, really nice, knowing that you guys like my stories enough to comment on them! Domo arigato gozaimasu, minna-san!

(Random thought: A short ways into this chapter, I said "…Akabane's arrival attracting any attention… " I'd just like to state for the record that that inadvertent alliteration excites me.)

Anyways, this chapter isn't exactly pure humor. Many laughs, I hope, will ensue, but this is fairly angsty too. That's 'cause, in my opinion, no good couple is complete without the angst! (Also, I just love writing angst in general!)

DISCLAIMER: I DUN OWN ANYTHING!

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**Chapter Four**

**Can You Feel the Love Tonight?**

Emishi and Kazuki were disappointed when their love spell didn't yield any obvious results, but they weren't ones to despair. Within three weeks, they had a brand new plan that was sure to work.

"Karaoke!" Emishi squealed in excitement. "Lock them in a karaoke bar and play love songs!"

Kazuki grinned. "Paul has that little karaoke room in the back. Let's use that!"

He led the Joker into the small room. "Wow!" Emishi said, looking around. "I didn't know this was here!"

"We usually use it for our birthday parties and the like," Kazuki explained.

They agreed that it would be easier to get Akabane in there first, then lure Ginji in and slam the door closed. But Akabane would be able to get out easily unless incapacitated.

Thus it was that Akabane was greeted upon walking through the main door by a baseball bat crashing onto the back of his skull.

As the black-clad figure crumpled to the ground, Kazuki grabbed the Transporter, hurriedly carrying him into the karaoke room- or "matchmakers' heaven", the term he and Emishi had been using to refer to it. Emishi had set a small fire in the kitchen to prevent Akabane's arrival attracting any attention, but he didn't have much time.

Kazuki noted, with some concern, the blood leaking out of Akabane's wound, but figured the freak could probably just soak it back up again, no trouble.

He snuck into the kitchen, leaning quietly against the doorframe. He was so inconspicuous that the others simply assumed they hadn't noticed him there in all the commotion.

The flames having been put out, Ban, Paul and Natsumi began moving back into the main room, Paul muttering under his breath about "idiot Jokers" as he walked. Ginji stayed behind to see if he could help clean up.

Kazuki said, "Come on, Ginji-kun. Let's go find some cleaning rags to try and get some of the smoke off of the ceiling." Ginji trustingly followed the Threadmaster into the back.

Kazuki slipped behind Ginji, who just went on into the karaoke room. As soon as Ginji had stepped through the door, Kazuki slammed it shut, locking it.

"Hey, Kazu? Kazu?" All he heard in reply was a wicked, hyper cackle, followed by a "WHAM!"

The next thing Ginji heard was Kazu's voice, slightly muffled, assuring him, "I totally meant to walk into that wall!"

-----

Ginji finally found the light switch. He sighed in relief as light flooded into the room, but his relief was short-lived.

"OH MY GEESE! AKABANE-SAMA!" After a moment of panic, tare-Ginji changed back into normal Ginji, realizing that there was no danger here. He stepped closer.

"Akabane-sama?" Ginji was worried about all the blood. He looked around the room. Seeing a cupboard in the corner, he opened the door and, taking out a few old cleaning rags, he tried to staunch the blood flow. At last, nearly ten minutes later, the blood seemed to be slowing, but Akabane's ribs still moved steadily up and down.

"Akabane-sama…" Ginji sank down to sit next to Akabane's head. He hoped the Jackal wouldn't die.

-----

Kazuki and Emishi high-fived before heading out to rejoin the group.

"Where's Ginji?" Ban asked.

Kazuki smiled. "Oh, I found a ticket to the zoo I'd meant to give Ginji-kun for his birthday. So he's at the zoo now."

Ban was surprised. "He just dashed off?"

"Well, it's really lucky I found it- it expires tomorrow."

Ban shrugged. Made sense to him. He was too sleepy to really think about it. "Well, if he comes looking for me, tell him I'm catchin' a nap in the car."

"Will do!" Paul said as Ban went out the door.

-----

The first thing he was aware of was the throbbing. The pain was aching, pounding through his skull. Akabane was used to pain, but rarely was it as acute as this.

He slowly became aware of his surroundings. Someone was nearby- he could feel it, smell the presence of fear. Akabane simply lay there, assessing his condition. Besides the sweet, excruciating pain in his head, he seemed fit.

A hand touched his shoulder.

Instincts, honed through years of battle and survival, kicked in. Though the pain in his skull was almost crippling, his will was stronger. Akabane leapt back, landing crouched in a corner, his back protected against the walls on either side. Scalpels flicked out into his hands, ready to strike.

Akabane's hands were actually halfway through throwing a lethal rain of blades before he realized what he was about to do. At the last instant, he managed to turn the attack, shooting scalpels harmlessly at the floor before recalling them to his body. But as the blades rushed back to him, he collapsed. Dizzy, Akabane wondered what was going on- but then he saw the bright red stain where he'd been lying. He winced slightly as he gingerly touched the swelling on his head.

_I've lost too much blood_, he realized. He was nearly defenseless- if he used his blood to make enough weapons for a proper battle, the blood left in his body simply wouldn't be able to keep him alive.

Ginji came forward, cautious. Akabane managed a smile. "I do apologize, Ginji-kun. I'm afraid my instincts took hold of my actions for a moment there."

Ginji smiled, albeit extremely nervously. "It's fine. Are you ok?" He was still obviously wary, but his concern seemed to override his fear.

"Ok, ya know what? That doesn't matter right now!" Ginji jumped, looking around for Emishi- that'd definitely been his voice, at least.

"E-Emishi?"

Kazuki's voice spoke, as if from nowhere. "We're on the sound system. That _is_ a karaoke room, after all!"

Akabane struggled to his feet, leaning against the wall. "And what is it that you want from us?"

Kazuki giggled. "Why what do _you_ think, silly?" Akabane looked positively frigid at being called "silly". "We want you two to fall madly in love, of course!" Ginji and Akabane immediately moved away from each other.

"And now!" Emishi cried. "Let the matchmaking begin!"

Suddenly, a drum beat started. Akabane merely stood leaning against the wall, silent. He raised one eyebrow as he watched Ginji begin dancing and singing along.

"So she said, "What's the problem, baby?"

What's the problem? I dunno

Well ma-"

"Ginji-kun, what on earth are you doing?" Akabane asked.

Ginji laughed. "Come on! This is 'Accidentally in Love'! I love Counting Crows!"

When his only reply was silence, he added, "Anyways, this song was in Shrek 2! I loved that movie!"

Akabane merely blinked. He couldn't even begin to fathom how Ginji-kun's mind worked- nor was he particularly eager to try.

That song ended, much to Akabane's (silent) delight, but then a new song began. And this time, Kazuki had his own edits to make.

"Sing with me now!" (_Over my dead body!_ Akabane thought.)  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la   
My, oh, my  
Look at the boy too shy  
He ain't gonna kiss the (Here Kazuki shouted "boy" over the word "girl".)  
Sha-la-la-la-la-la  
Ain't that sad  
Ain't it a shame, too bad  
You gonna miss the (Again Kazuki edited the song to make it more fitting for the situation.)"

And yet again, there Ginji was, dancing and singing along. Akabane shook his head. It was sad, watching the boy lose any shred of self-respect he'd ever had.

This went on for literally hours. Finally, Kazuki, yawning over what he'd announced to be his seventh cup of coffee for the day, told them that after one last song he and Emishi were leaving.

"What about us, Threadmaster?" Akabane asked.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Kazuki replied. "You two can stay there overnight!"

Emishi interrupted. "Anyways, point is we need to get this song done first."

Akabane groaned inwardly when he heard the song starting. Despite his refined tastes in music, even he'd suffered through this song before.

"I LOVE THE LION KING!" Ginji screeched in excitement.

"CAN YOU FEEL… THE LOVE TONIGHT?" Ginji, Kazuki and Emishi started. However, Akabane decided that he had enough blood for one attack as long as it was small, and formed a scalpel in his hand. He proceeded to completely destroy the sound system. Ignoring a pouting tare-Ginji, he reabsorbed the scalpel.

A few minutes later, two voices outside the door informed them that their "hosts" were leaving for the night.

And that was that. Ginji and Akabane were locked in for the night. Alone.

-----

For a while, Ginji contented himself with driving Akabane slowly insane, humming that infernal song over and over again. But soon, he grew restless.

Ginji walked towards the door, trying the handle, which was still locked. He walked around the whole room, looking for other doors. Akabane watched him curiously, wondering what was so agitating the boy.

At length, he voiced the question. "Ginji-kun, what's wrong?"

Ginji looked over at him. "Are we… are we actually… _trapped_ in here?" His eyes darted around. "There's gotta be a way out."

Akabane smiled slightly. "You'd know that better than I, Ginji-kun. You're the one who's been looking into that."

Ginji attempted a nervous laugh. "I-I guess I'm overreacting a bit, huh?" He sat down, but ended up jumping up very soon to check the doorknob again.

"Ginji-kun?"

Ginji's breathing was beginning to grow harder. "A-Akabane-sama… h-how are we going to get out? We need to get out."

Akabane pushed himself away from the wall. He managed, though he was still fairly weak, to get to the sofa on the other side of the room. He gestured for Ginji to sit down as well.

Ginji sat, but he still looked extremely agitated. Akabane looked at him. "Ginji-kun, why are you so concerned with getting out?"

Ginji looked scared. "I-I… don't… like being shut in."

Akabane saw the beginnings of lightning flicker behind Ginji's eyes. He knew that, weak as he was, he would have no defense should the Lightning Emperor emerge. _But how can I keep the Lightning Emperor from taking over Ginji-kun?_

**nyanyanyanyanya**

…how indeed?

…I'm serious, folks. I had the rest of the chapter planned out, but I got stuck right there. X.x; Luckily, once I get over this one little snag, I know what's gonna happen… it's just that, um… there's this problem in the way before I can do the rest.

So, until I figure out how he can calm Ginji down/keep the Lightning Emperor from taking over, the next post isn't gonna happen, unfortunately. Ideas?

…please?


	5. OMG! PLEASE DON'T KILL MEEEEE!

Authoress' Notes:

Eeek! Ever gotten stuck and taken a break from writing? Well I just did, and now I'm paying for it- my writing's gotten so bad! Sorry for that. It's also 4am and I'm listening to hyper music, so this borderline-angsty chapter just… yeah. It's Special, ne?

By the way, props to **ideagala**-sama! You left a comment with four suggestions on how to do this chapter. Of them, three (Ginji's traumatic past, Ginji falling asleep on Akabane-sama and a funny admission) were part of my original ideas for it! You read my mind! –finds that all cool 'n stuff-

DISCLAIMER: I DUN OWN ANYTHING!

**nyanyanyanyanya**

**Chapter Five**

**OMG! PLEASE DON'T KILL MEEEEE!**

Ginji jumped up, power surging through him as he looked around frantically.

Akabane knew that if the Lightning Emperor took over Ginji, he had no chance of defending himself. So, he did something very un-Akabane-ish.

He begged for his life. Granted, it may not have appeared as if he were, but for Akabane, this was the equivalent of screaming, "OH MY GOD PLEASE DON'T KILL MEEEEEEEEEE!" and dissolving into tears. Akabane was just classier about it.

"Ginji-kun! It's ok… Ginji-kun, calm down. Please calm down, ok? I'll make sure nothing bad happens to you!"

The lightning still crackled behind Ginji's eyes, but he relaxed slightly. _Go away,_ he thought. _I'm not in danger. Go back inside me, Raitei!_ Ginji shuddered, as, with a tremendous effort, he managed to push the Emperor back down inside himself.

Shaking, Ginji sat back down. "A-Akabane-sama… I'm… I-" And suddenly Ginji was crying as he thought about what had almost happened.

Akabane just sat there. He wasn't sure what to do. Akabane Kurodou, for all his skill and sophistication, was at a complete loss when it came to comforting people.

And it didn't exactly help when Ginji glomped Akabane and buried his head in the other man's chest as he said over and over again, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry…"

Akabane inwardly conveyed his eternal thanks towards whatever deities might exist for the fact that Kazuki and Emishi weren't present to see the slight blush on his cheeks. If there was one thing he was totally uncomfortable with, it was physical contact.

But that still didn't help. Ginji didn't seem like he would let go any time soon. _I _could _just _make_ him get off of me, I suppose…_

But Ginji was being so innocent that Akabane, reminded of a young, dark-haired boy who'd once cried alone with no one to comfort him, didn't have the heart to push him away. He settled for awkwardly patting Ginji on the head, saying, "It's ok Ginji-kun. No one got hurt. It's alright."

Now if there's one thing omniscient narrators have been telling us for frikkin' forever, it's that a good cry makes any problem better. This omniscient narrator is no different- she just feels like pointing out the cheesiness of her own statement. So!

A good cry can make almost any problem better.

This was certainly true of Ginji. After a while, his tears seemed to be lessening, and finally he sniffled and lifted his head slightly. There was a brief yet awkward pause as brown eyes met violet eyes, barely 6 inches away from each other. Only then did the reality of the current situation fully sink in.

With a speed that Akabane himself would have been hard-pressed to match, even at the best of times, Ginji leapt backwards, blushing furiously. "Um… uh, sorry 'bout that," Ginji muttered, looking anywhere but at Akabane.

The blushing Transporter, also avoiding eye-contact, muttered uncomfortably that it was quite alright, really.

Silence appeared, laying waste to the kingdom that is Conversation. There she remained for quite a few minutes, cackling wickedly, yet silently. Eventually Akabane summoned his courage and banished her, defeating her so that all that remained was her piercing, yet still silent, death cry.

"Ano… Ginji-kun?"

"Hm?"

"…when do you think they're gonna let us out of here?"

"…I dunno."

"…ah."

Silence, resurrected, returned to her former domain for a while. But again she was vanquished!

"…Akabane-sama?"

"Hm?"

"…I really am sorry about that."

"…don't worry about it."

"…'k."

Yet again, Silence lived! And… yet again, she died. She's having a rough day, ne?

"…ne, Ginji-kun?"

"Hm?"

"…what happened there?"

"…well Raitei kinda showed up, and he wanted to fry you, but I wouldn't let him," Ginji said, going all chibi and smiling winningly. Akabane sweatdropped.

"…well, thank you, Ginji-kun."

"Huh? For what?"

"Keeping the Lightning Emperor from coming out."

"Oh, um… no problem!"

…Silence is dead. They were merely quiet for a moment. Then Akabane spoke without meaning to. "I must confess, I'm not sure I would have been able to survive had he come out."

Ginji stared. "W-what?" He sounded as if he'd just learned that… well, that Akabane was mortal! What's more shocking than _that_?

Akabane merely pointed at the puddle of his own blood still gracing the floor. Ginji smiled sheepishly. "Oh, right. That."

-----

Hours later, weariness finally won as Ginji's eyes slowly… closed… and he slowly… leaned…

Akabane was rather surprised to find a lump of sleeping Ginji deposited in his lap. He poked Ginji, trying to get the boy to move a little further away. No response. He poked again. Still nothing. Akabane hit Ginji over the head, shouting, "Ginji-kun! Get off of me!"

"…snrgh? …flmmlgrglmf…" And with that enlightening comment, Ginji went back to sleep.

Sighing, Akabane gave up, leaning his head against the wall as he fell asleep.

-----

A few hours later, around 4am, Kazuki and Emishi crept back into the Honky Tonk. They were about to go back to tormenting their captives when they looked at the video camera conveniently placed in the room. Squealing in matchmaking delight, the two unlocked the door to the karaoke room and stole away, giggling.

-----

Akabane woke up as he heard the front door of the shop open. Paul was opening up for the morning. Akabane managed to gently lift Ginji's head off of his lap and place it on the sofa. He crept out of the room and out the back door before anyone could see him.

If anyone _had_ been there to see him, they'd have seen him pause as he left the room, glancing back at Ginji's sleeping form. As it was, no one saw Akabane's face relax slightly as a gentle smile crept onto his face for a moment. But then it was gone, and so was Akabane.

**nyanyanyanyanya**

Hmm, ya know that part where I said Akabane was pretty much screaming, "OH MY GOD PLEASE DON'T KILL MEEEEEEEEEE!"? Anyone ever seen Blues Brothers? Ya know when Jake and Elwood are in the sewer and psycho-chick corners them, and Jake falls on his knees and screams for her to spare their lives? xD Yeah, this is Akabane's equivalent of that moment, pretty much.

Oh, and in case you didn't catch it, the "…young, dark-haired boy who'd once cried alone with no one to comfort him…" is a pointless Akabane angst moment. -shrug- I think it's a cute idea.

Anynyu… please review!


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